Seeing Through The Eyes Of Love

We all know what it's like to be afraid... We also all know what it's like to defend ourselves. We learn how to survive what we perceive as emotional threats by creating strategies for protection. It's amazing really, how perfectly our systems take care of us!

The interesting thing we can look at, as adults, is whether those protective strategies serve us any more. Really, do they? Do those walls protect us - or isolate us? Do those voice tones, those facial expressions, those silent chasms serve to keep us safe, or do they actually create more of what it is we don't want? Do they create connection and love, or separation and mistrust?

I've been discovering that perhaps we can make the radical decision to choose love, even when it feels like suicide. Whenever we have a disconnection with another person, there seems to be a really good chance that both parties are just afraid; Afraid of not being enough, of being invisible, of being judged or criticized...

So, when we are afraid like this, there is an opportunity to stretch ourselves beyond our comfort zone and become a bigger human. This, by simply softening the defenses. Let's face it, we know how to protect ourselves. We've survived up to this point. Maybe we can lean into the truth that tells us "I will not die from this!". Then we can drop shield and sword and stand there with our hearts exposed. This would mean trusting the greatest force there is.

© 2008 Justina Vail Evans. All rights reserved.